Tuesday´s Tribute

My tribute today is to my big sister.

She is the oldest of us three siblings, I am the youngest, and well we have a brother right smack bang in the middle! Man isn´t he the lucky one!!!!

It may sound corny, but I wouldn´t want to even begin to guess where I would be today if it wasn´t for my sister.

Not only was she there to take care of me as a new born due to my Mum´s paralasis, (click here to read more about that) but at the tender age of 10, she sat on my bed and led me through the prayer that made me a newborn into the Kingdom of Heaven!

She has travelled with me along this road we call life from the very beginning, and has been with me in the good and rescued me in the bad. Yes... in very essence I don´t know what would have been for my life, if she hadn´t made herself available to be instrumental in God´s hands to reach me!

My sister and I are soooo alike in some things and sooooooo different in others. We share many loves: one of them is humour. We love doing skits, laughing and making jokes.

This is my sis and me doing a funny skit during our 1920's Party!

I so appreciate having an older sister because I always feel protected just knowing she is around. She is very selfless and has always looked out for my bro and me.

My sister is very detailed. She loves theories, explanations and sudokus. She always has systems for why and how things work, which saves me having to think about it! A classic first born trait if ever I saw one! (read the birth order book and you will be amazed and every enlightened...i just love that book)

I´m so glad she lives just down the road and not hardly a day goes by when we don't see each other. Sis, I love you. Thank you God for giving me the bestest big sister a younger sister could ever have.

What not to do when EMILY arrives!

This is an imagine of Hurricane Emily.... and maybe this is the first thing that springs to mind when you hear the word Emily.... But that is not the one I am talking about today....

The first time I became acquainted with "Emily" was when I was 18 and freshly arrived in Spain. We are talking about 1983 and yes, now you can guess how old I am!

The phrase that my new American friend shared with me back then was, "Oh dear, Emily is coming for next week for a visit. I better get prepared!!!!"

Now not having been exposed to the Big Wide World (I had just left the island!) and being the unsuspected Brit that I was, I had absolutely NO IDEA who Emily was, why she was coming to visit or what exactly my dear friend had to prepare!!!!

Needless to say, it didn´t take too long for the proverbial penny to drop and all you women out there will recognize this visitor intimately! She comes once a month to us females and one simply MUST be prepared!!!



Emily, naturally was a code name. This was of course of great importance working in mixed company. One had to be able to discuss these things without the "other party" cottoning on to it! Just the mention of her name and the feminine crew will stand together as one in understanding and in support!

Yes, Emily brings a great big hormonal upheaval with her. Even though we know she is coming, somehow she always seems to catch us unawares.... I don´t know how that happens.

(now what would he know????)

I mean, I consider myself somewhat of a logical creature so why does this phenomenon always seem to catch me unprepared if it is so regular?

Well, as the years go by, I can only say that when the weepy feelings come accompanied with that mighty urge to bite some undeserving soul´s head off or having to resort to the "fat" clothes in your wardrobe... you just learn to not let these feelings get the better of you as opposed to being dominated by them....

It´s kind of like walking by faith and not by sight. You don´t allow that tainted vision to distract you from what you know is real and you learn to recognize that these feelings too shall pass.............

For a bit of fun I thought you would like to know what my years have taught me not to do just before and/or during a visit from a dear friend we all know and love.... Emily.....!!!!

1. Don´t decide to change your hair style.

Funnily enough I have had this urge happen to me several times over the years. Sadly on more than once occasion I have succumbed to it and consequently left the hairdresser in tears.

My advice: always wait a couple of days before you make this decision...sometimes things look better after a few days... and if not... you can still be radical and go for that super short cut that looks really good on famous people like Demi Moore!!!!!(not very often on REAL people!!)

2. Don´t go and try on clothes in your favourite shop

I honestly believe that even on non Emily days, the mirrors in clothing shop changing rooms do nothing for one´s self esteem. (You think they would cotton on to this and make mirrors offering a better reflection than reality consequently generating greater sales as people would buy more stuff) Anyway back to the point. ...

When you have Emily visiting, this experience seems to be multiplied out of all proportion and you body gains bulges and kilos before your very eyes. If you weren´t feeling bad before you went into the changing room, chances are you will feel very fat by the time you leave.... And this all happens before you even take the desired piece of clothing off the hanger to try it on...

I think there must exist some biological explanation for this, and that the hormones somehow play havoc on your retina, leaving your eyesight somewhat out of whack for a few days. My advice: leave well alone until hormone levels have been stabilized and normal eyesight is restored!!!!

3. Don´t go shopping for a speedo bathing cap!

Have you ever noticed that even the most beautiful woman can look horrendous as soon as she has one of those sleeky Lycra or plastic swimming caps on? This process of metamorphosis can happen to any unsuspecting female who attempts to do a few lengths in her local indoor pool to keep off the extra pounds by putting one of these deadly caps on.

It never ceases to amaze me that as soon as I put one of those endearing caps on my head, I become instantly ugly. My advice: avoid all contact with this vinyl head wear unless it´s absolutely necessary.

4. Never trust a mirror

For the same reason as mention above in point 2.

D.V. D. T. H. H. I.

(defective vision due to high hormonal influence)

Mirrors can not be trusted at this time for confirmation of beauty. One must rely solely on husband or best girl friends opinion to ride out this temporary deficiency.... My advice: a good dose of biblical truth never goes a miss . Great verse, "you are fearfully and wonderfully made!!!!" will help to keep this insecurity at bay.

5.Don´t do a meditation on all your defects, your spouses and kids defects, the worlds problems etc!

A tremendous temptation during Emily´s visit is to want to try and put the world to rights or focus in on everything that is going wrong in your life. This is a particularly difficult hormonal power to deal with at this time is called: focusing on husband´s faults hormone.

This hormone then triggers off another hormone that controls the mouth and voice box, consequently producing the following monologue:

"I mean it´s about time he knew what I go through and started to appreciate me more... I work around the house, fix his meals, take care of the kids... and he doesn´t even notice.... arg.... "

These words are usually followed by the incredible urge to run away....at least for a couple of days.... just long enough for the whole family to realize what a wonderful woman you are!!! This temporary dysfunction is an override of the basic well being system that is safely established on non Emily visits that often rights itself after a couple of days.

My advice: Tape your mouth with Duct tape or any other such adhesive to avoid verbal explosion or hysteria, bite your tongue or and re read your diary the 101 reasons why I love my husband/children/life written during a non Emily transition and this will work like an antidote...pretty much guaranteed!!!

I´m sure you can come up with more such ditties... but I didn't want to end this post on that note....

I wanted to say that my main antidote to survive Emily´s visits and other stresses and strains in life is: LAUGHTER!!!

Of course it goes without saying that once I leave my cares with the Lord and trust Him with what concerns me and mine, a whole hearted laugh is Nº 1 on my to do list. Yes I would put it right up there with a good cup of tea! Find something that you enjoy or find funny and tuck in.

I love watching "I love Lucy" or "Home Improvement". Both sitcoms always manage to break me into a smile and lift me up.

I have always liked a good laugh... humour was a staple in my home growing up and it seems that now, scientists have finally got the message and are declaring it "healthy" (the bible has said that for centuries...laughter does good like a medicine...)

There are even laughter therapies out there.... so ladies... don´t let Emily get you down.... turn your frown upside down.... and go on...have a good laugh.

Other "endorphin" freeing activities include singing (as if no one can hear you...you know...right from the heart....) and dancing (as if know one can see you... like really boogie to your favorite CD...whoa yeah..go girl!!!)

Oh yeah...before I forget... chocolate is beneficial to this hormonal state... so a few squares with a good dose of laughter and/or romantic movie is just what the doctor ordered.... REALLY!

A little home truth

Health, fitness and happiness.

We all know the importance of eating well, exercising and laughing from the "gut" on a regular basis, to be the ingredients for a Healthy life.

Well, like you, I do try to pass on what I have learned to my little angels (haha). Just the other day though, a little humorous truth came to me out of the mouths of one of my babes!

Let me shed a little light on the circumstances!

Two of my wonderful 3 children are good eaters and one remaining is a "I don´t like anything remotely healthy looking" battlefield at meal times champion!

Life being as it is...contradictory..... The two "good eaters" were given to:

a) the flu and following throat infection- thus missing school for more than a week

b) twisted his ankle and suffered a 2nd degree sprain - hence condemned to using crutches and missing school one day.

The one day that these two coincided in missing school, my junk food junkie was therefore the only child in the household to attend school. As I walked down the stairs to accompany him to the gate he said,

"I´m the only one who doesn´t eat his vegetables and look, I am the only kid healthy! "

Hmm.... what can you say to that? On the contrary my dear Watson!

No running water.....

Praise the Lord, O my soul; and FORGET NOT ALL HIS BENEFITS.
Ps 103:2

This week was a reminder to me of this very verse!

Growing up in the western world, it´s easy to take for granted so many things because we have had them all our lives. Take running water for example. Even though the majority of the world does not having the luxury of running water and even less in the comfort of it in their own homes, having water at the ready 24-7 is something that we definitely take for granted.... that I take for granted.

This week we were without water for over 2 days and I had to become creative at showering and washing dishes by heating up water from our pool! I have the luxury of bottled water to cover my thirst so of course, considering the odds, my "suffering" is really not worth the mention. But for my standard of living, it was quite the headache and it required more time to accomplish tasks that normally are done without even thinking!

Isn´t it true that as soon as these comforts are removed, we quickly begin to appreciate what we have?? Just as the old saying goes... "You don´t know what you got until it´s gone!" rings loud and clear doesn´t it?

Naturally, I prayed and asked the Lord would give me water again. Do you know what happened next?

IT RAINED!

We desperately need rain, so naturally the sight of this desired product not only came as a surprize from those colder northern lands, but it WAS NOT the answer that I had expected to my prayer..... I´m like, "God, I don´t want water outside the house but INSIDE!" Maybe praying specifically would have been helpful here!!!!!

Actually I felt that God really spoke to me through this and I had the opportunity of sharing it with some dear friends of mine going through a period of transition.

God often surprizes us when he doesn´t answer our prayers to open specific doors in the way we imagine. You know, those "obvious" prayer needs we have: Lord heal my Mum, provide a job...etc....But often God opens a window instead!

These are the moments when our faith and trust really kick into action.

We stand there somewhat stunned at God´s response to our need and say, "Okay God, that isn´t quite what I had in mind.... cough & choke in disbelief , a few minutes go by to regain control, and then comes the classic question: "What did YOU do THAT for?

Admittedly when it started raining, and we continued without running water, I had to smirk at the irony of it all. I had all the water I wanted outside...but that WASN´T what I needed! Now try and tell me that God doesn´t have a sense of humour!!!!

I was reminded at that point, that so often we ask for things that we think we need, but God in his Love and Wisdom opens a window instead of a door. We usually don´t understand it at the moment BUT it´s always for our best...AND generally is accompanied with the later realization that God´s reply was the best thing for us although at the time it didnt make sense.

In the bible God often challenges the "logic" and "commonsense" of our fragile human nature. The first instance that comes to mind is when God has the Joshua and the people of Israel march around the walls of Jericho in silence and then the walls of this ever so fortified city would come crumbling down to the ground.

Can you begin to imagine Joshua, the military and spiritual leader of the community, explaining this tremendously logical and powerful strategy to attack their enemies and see the walls come tumbling down by silently marching around this city? I can just hear a, "yeah right!" coming from the crowd... I mean really, how illogical can one be? Oh and one mustn´t forget the logic of putting the musicians first... now there´s a arrowhead to lead the nation... a bunch of singers to prepare the way...no military training, no armour... just a few guitars and harps to help those 1 mile think walls come to their knees! (Being a musician... I can say that!!!)

How about the disciples during the storm.... What´s Jesus doing? Is He their calming their concerns, explaining the science of the power of the waves and their distance from the shore so they don´t worry, NO, no, no, Jesus was SLEEPING!

Apparently Jesus is totally oblivious to the goings on, which just totally goes against the grain, like nails going down the chalk board. Our logic cries out in disgust and God encounters it with a completely different dimension, where everything and every law obeys God and the impossible becomes THE POSSIBLE.

God´s sense of humour is seen again and again in the Bible of illogical moments such as when God lets the sun stop still, the Red Sea opens, a donkey talks, an elderly woman gets pregnant...oh man the list is endless.

This reality surrenders us to our knees and we have to acknowledge once again, that God truley is God and His Ways are not our ways and His Thoughts are not our thoughts.....and whatever He does is always WELL DONE!!

Afection & Afirmation: Antidotes for All

April 21st

Well it´s now 11;10pm . It´s been a full day.....basically full with being with Abu in the hospital and driving backwards and forwards to the hospital!!!

After dropping off no 3 to school at 9:00am Deb and I drove to Alcalá to visit Abu in the hospital. He was to be operated this morning on his elbow, which he broke quite badly after a fall. He needed to have a nail and wire put in it...(sounds like we are building a fence or fixing a radio rather than a human body!!!) as the elbow articulation was pretty messed up.

I finally was able to lay the theory aside of my studies this week, and put it into practice by visiting with Abu to comfort and encourage him in his fear of the op and the anesthetic. God was gracious and Abu ended up only needing a local anesthetic and not a general as was first expected.

Abu was actually called upf or the operation before the designated time and so Deb & I were able to accompany him right to the operating rooms (hey my English is going to pot....I can´t think for the life of me what the correct word is...oh well you will just have to forgive me!!!!) .

We had the privilege of waiting 2 hours there in one of those lovely hospital waiting rooms. Which I have to admit that here in Spain is a lot more lively than anything I have experienced in the land of the Britons. Spanish people enjoy everything at a higher volume level than the rest of the world, so it makes even the hospital not feel so drab and dreary...which is a great blessing...especially when the heating is on "broil" . That, plus the quiet hush in English hospitals, is enough to drift anyone off to "lala" land if you ask me..... Why do they do that ? I mean, isn´t warmth seducive to like bacteria and stuff? Aren´t there people out there who study this and then apply the knowledge into a hospital situaion? Anyway, back to the plot...

To my immense frustration, I had forgotten to take a book with me or any kind of sustenance, (we didn´t think he would go in before we left...) so I had to amuse myself with the vending machine (pressing buttons to "win" a bottle of mineral water) and ask fellow "waiter" (as in she was waiting too and not as in cafeteria serve you coffee...haha...boy am I so funny!!!) for permission to read their nice glossy magazine on the latest gossip about the rich and the famous.

Actually it was Debee who humbled herself to do the "begging" of the above mentioned mag.... I was thinking about it for a while...but hadn´t built up the courage or reached the extent of boredom that pushed me to perform such a humble activity!! Sadly for us though, this spark of excitement was short lived because the kind "donators" were called away just minutes after we got the mag. Hey so much for that...

The surgeon who operated on Abu finally called us 2 hours later and told us that everything had gone like "clockwork" and Abu would be taken up to his ward within the next few hours. Of course at this stage...we had barely enough time to buy a birthday present for the Birthday party No 3 would be going too this afternoon, and to pick her up from School.

After a quick lunch and run No 2 to football training and back(accompanied by literally SHEETS of rain) .....we were back on our way to the hospital to check on Abu again. We found him already well enveloped by visitors (which was a good thing as we weren´t able to be there when he was brought back up to his ward) and he was in good spirits.

We also were able to encourage his fellow roomie. A Portuguese Carpenter (it was the room of the carpenters....and I don´t mean the 1970´s bro-sis duet singers!!!) who had had a run in with a machine and cut some fingers. OUCH!!! Yes, pretty nasty stuff. The guy was in tremendous pain, as you can well imagine. I asked the nurse if she could bring him a pillow as the poor guy didn´t even have one....

It´s sad when the staff are so busy doing their job that the "human/social" side of medicine goes out of the window and these things go undetected.

As is spanish was somewhat weak, Deb was able to use her Portuguese skills to cheer him up a little. We later found out that he was just in Spain working for a few weeks before this happened....his wife and children are back in Portugal and they didn´t even know he was in hospital.......................Everyone has their story....

Anyway, we were able to leave Abu well, in a bit of pain, but well and with strict instructions to ask for a painkiller to help make it through the night. The anesthetic was wearing off and he was in obvious discomfort.

I am more and more convinced of the tremendous importance for human affection and emotional support as a vital part in treating older people and any "people" for that matter. With out which, medicine is just half a science........a very weak response to a very real need.

Well I am going to get off my soap box for today!!!!

It´s late, but I feel like I made a good investment into a few lives today....

Tomorrow will be busy too

sleep well
ally